i'd like to believe that it's okay to be misunderstood, that i'm ok with that. but i'm not. i don't think anyone can really ever be, if they are being honest with themselves. while i may not chase popularity and aspire to be well-liked and whatsoever, being misunderstood can at times hurt.
breaking out of this bubble has been difficult, and i'm still adjusting to it. i'm so out of touch with social habits and practices, its like having to re-learn how to eat or something like that. but one must not see the world with rose tinted lenses, because lets face it things out there will never be as good. we had too much of a good thing, and now its coming back to haunt us. but slowly, i guess, one step at a time. start with things i'm familiar with, and go from there. sometimes its just about saying hi. its not that difficult, is it?
people seldom think this much. i often forget, and it leads me to do rather inane things. and it all adds up see? i allow people to misjudge me, because i always forgot that everyone is very much different. its something of a vicious cycle i think.
i'd still like to think i'm ok with it. generally i am. its just sometimes i'm not. often i don't even know when that is.
do we look as we are, or are we as we look? i think for most people you can somewhat figure out who they are just by how they look, what they wear etc. i guess what i'm really saying is that most people are simple. and that's perfectly okay. if anything that's probably better. i don't think i've met anyone with as eclectic a dress sense as mine. sometimes (ok often) even i myself am confused. perhaps its because i'm still not quite sure who i am as a person. it always comes back to the whole identity thing. its not that i'm having an identity crisis or anything (i hope not), but more that i find i can be a different person to different people.
i'm weird. i know. and it used to be perfectly alright. but now i'm not quite sure anymore.
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